Four Seasons in Belgium

Funny, how such a ‘little creature’ can change our lifes drastically.
I mean, I used to be a party girl, self-centered bitch, and goddamned ambitious… Until Alyssa came along…

Who would have thought, that instead of reading Cosmopolitan, now I read all these parenting magazines… and even joined this mommy’s club!

Being a mom has changed me drastically. And I would like to share with all of you, how I face the world now with this new title!

…Worry…
Welcome to the world full of worry!!
I get this feeling all the times! When Alyssa didn’t wanna eat, I thought, maybe she’s ill. When she ate too much, I was afraid that she’d puke or have stomach-ache or worse… getting too big! When she didn’t wanna sleep, I got pissed, but when she slept too long, I kept on checking her, to make sure she’s still breathing!
It’s completely normal, yet annoying!

…A one-handed-mom…
Since Alyssa was born, I forgot that I have two hands! The thing is, my left hand is always busy, either holding Alyssa or pushing the pram! Quite frankly, I dunno how any other moms with more than one kid can manage.. and survive!!!

…You’re not everything in this world anymore, She is!!! …
If you were a spoiled brat like me, who thought that the world would stop spinning without you, then you should be thankful that once your baby was born, a new you were also born on the same day! Forget that you haven’t bought yourself a new pair of jeans since last year, forget that you need to go to the spa to rejuvenate yrself, all you could think about is that little one of yours! Becareful!!! You might end up creating a new -maybe even worse- spoiled brat just like the old you!

…Proudness…
I’ve never been so proud before about anything in my life the way I feel now for having Alyssa… Even silly little things she does, can make me fly to the moon!!! I was a proud woman, proud with my achievements… but all those were nothing compared to what I’m feeling now. When she smiled at me, when she kissed me, when she was being friendly to other people… Even when she did something ‘bad’ like jumping out of the bed or begging for food from some stranger in the mall (sumpah, malu2in abes!)…

…Compromise…
Some people call it ’sacrifice’, but I refuse to use that word. Yeah, I have to give up my career. Yeah, I have to stay at home all the times. Yeah, I have to wake up in the middle of the night when I prefer to stay in bed… Yeah, I cant go partying whenever I want to. But then so what? She never asked to be born.. She also gives me so much joy…

…Patience…
I thought I was the most impatient person in this world. But somehow, Alyssa has her own ‘magic’ that makes me melt and cant get angry with her. ( I think she has it from her Dad!)

…Strength…
I’ve always known that I was strong, but I didn’t know that I could be that strong!!! I mean raising children is not easy, especially in my case, where I practically have to do anything on my own! (Jo is a terrific dad, but he spends most of the time working).

…The most challenging job…
When I was young (!), I underestimated these stay-home-mums. I thought what an easy life they had!!! It’s such a no-brainer job!!! But then now, I realized how WRONG I was!
Before, my motto was: Work hard, party hard!!! I spent hours and hours in the office, dealing with unimaginable deadlines and unbelievable projects, but they were nothing compared to what I’m facing now!!!!
Don’t get me wrong, I still wanna have a career again some day, but I just wanna tell you that motherhood is not an easy job!!! It is the most demanding, challenging, but also fulfilling job I’ve ever had!!!!

I’ve never realized that I could be inspiring to others… But I did!
Last night, a friend of mine confessed that after reading my previous post ‘Go smokers, go!’, he decided that he didnt need to quit smoking!

Am I a genius or what? LOL!!!!

Btw, thank you very much David, if you read this… You might be the first person who thought I was trully inspiring!

But actually, this wasnt the first time I made someone stop trying to quit smoking. Years ago, when Jo was still my friend, I made him forget his goodwill too by giving him 10 packs of Indonesian cigarettes when we were in Copenhagen. All he said was ‘ Fanny, I was trying to quit… ‘ with this hopeless face!

Oh my, I wish some cigarette company like phillip morris or something, read my blog! I mean, I defend them! I make them earn more money! They should give me some rewards!!!!!!!!!!! LOL

Anyhoo people, dont get me wrong. It’s not that I am telling you all to start smoking more. All I was trying to say is that people shouldnt make such a big deal about it too much.

Smokers are not criminals!!! Lets respect each other more by not just eliminating our right to smoke.

Just give us some smoking rooms and time that we deserve, and we’ll be happy!!!

And when we’re happy, we can still continue our contribution to make the world a better place to live, by supporting the economy!!!!!!

Thank you for your attention, Ladies and gentlemen…..

I’m in a dilemma.

Well, yeah, this is not the first time. My life is just so full of drama, some people nominated me to be the drama queen of the year.

Anyhoo, because this is my blog, I’m entitled to have all kinds of dilemmas or dramas as often as i want to… Right ? right…

This is the case : I can’t really decide what I want in my life at the moment.

I mean, if you asked me two years ago, i would have simply told you that i wanted carrier above anything. At least for the next 5 years…

But now, of course things have changed. I have a family now. My path of life shifted two years ago when i decided to let go of my carrier, and marry the man of my life. Everybody was suprised (can’t blame them, i was shocked as hell !), but as always, i did what i wanted to do.

And now, here I am, never knew that things can be so darn complicated. There is a piece of me who still wants to achieve something, but some part of me tells me to wait. I’m confused whether I have to start looking for a new job or go back to school, or just simply wait until my darling little angel Alyssa is old enough to be left alone.

If I wait, then it will be more difficult to go back to the professional life, but if I do it now, then I might lose Alyssa’s childhood, and there’s no getting back to it…

Beside, honestly and surprisingly, sometimes I do think that I really can enjoy the role of motherhood…

So the question is, do I really want a carrier or is it simply just my ego ?
But then again, there’s nothing wrong about having an ego, is it ?

Lately, I found non-smoking signs and anti-smoking campaigns everywhere…
Some countries even have specific laws that prohibit people to smoke in public area, including restaurants and even bars and pubs!!!

Everywhere I go , I see this signs, and even in the comfort and private place such as my own house, I still cant avoid the fact that now the whole world is turning against me –and others smokers as well- by putting so many advertisements about the risks of smoking, which are scary and disgusting.

What’s the matter with you people?

I knew, and I guess EVERY SMOKERS knew the risk of smoking…
But do you think that it really helps?

The question is, why do you governments and non-smokers hate us so much?
Why do you want to turn us into non-smokers as well?

Now, sit back and relax. Close your eyes and imagine this situation…
IF, we, all the smokers around the world agreed to just quit on smoking… imagine what will happen?

Of course, the cigarette industries will go bankrupt…

Next question is:
Where do all the people who work at Phillip Morris, BAT, Dji Sam Soe, Gudang Garam, etc have to go?
What happen to the economy of one country, and the whole wide world?
Have the government got any plans to avoid the increasing number of unemployment?
Have the government considered how much tax income that will be lost from this ?

IF they got the answers of all the questions above, I might be the first who’ll quit on smoking!

But at the moment, since I’m pretty sure that nobody can give me the right answers, I’m gonna keep on smoking and proud of it!!!!

Ugh, I woke up with a hangover this morning.
Not good…

Gara-garanya, semalem gue dinner ama laki gue dan kebanyakan minum wine. Padahal sebenernya nggak banyak banget juga sih, cuma 3 gelas plus segelas Kirr, tapi kenapa efeknya begini ya?

Maybe it’s because I’m old now…. hehehe
The fact that I have realized but also have tried to deny as well!

I notice that several things have changed. Like my intolerance with alcohol, or inability to dance all night long or the worst, I got tired easily even for shopping!!!

A few months ago, Jo kicked me out of the house. He said, go have fun and I’ll take care of Alyssa. Of course, as a good wife, I’m obliged to obey my husband, :p!

So I went to Antwerp and met Kenza, and we planned to shop till we drop, thinking that it would take us hours and hours to make each of us became sick for shopping.
But guess what? After only three hours, we looked at each other, admitting that we were indeed, very tired!

What a shame!

Only a year before, I spent 7 hours to shop nonstop, and at that time I was 8 months pregnant. I even went off shopping all by myself when I was having contractions…

This is silly.
I wish there’s some kind of SUPERVITAMIN that can give me back the strength I used to have…

Berhubung para blogger suka pada bikin, jadinya gue ikut2 an bikin ini juga deh…

1. My name is Fanny, I’m Indonesian
2. I live in Belgium with Jo, my hubby and Alyssa, my princess
3. I love them to death
4. I am a book junkie
5. I love fashion
6. I love shoes
7. I love bags
8. Basically I just love shopping
9. My hobby-beside shopping- is reading
10. I’m allergic to chocolate
11. I cant live without chocolate
12. I met my hubby in Denmark
13. We used to be bestfriends because he always brought me the famous Belgian Chocolates
14. It was vodka that brought us together ( a real russian vodka)
15. I left my bright future carrier for him
16. Never regretted that so far.
17. If only we could live in Jakarta
18. I belive we will someday…
19. One of my biggest dream is to bring my mom to Mecca (Mekah)
20. I’m addicted to bubble bath
21. I dont take shower everyday
22. I’m a smoker and proud of it
23. I think that smokers help the world economy
24. I have written a book but not satisfied with the result
25. I have a high standart for everything
26. I’m bad at spelling and typing
27. I’m not religious
28. I dont want a pet, because I hate cleaning
29. I like parties but I’m also a loner
30. A lot of people think I’m smart but i guess they’re wrong
31. I’m very moody
32. Dont come near me on my PMS-days
33. I am a family person
34. I can be a bitch
35. I’m an only child
36. I hope my family and friends know how much I love them
37. I have no time for narrow minded people
38. I hate sinetron!
39. I love to get vouchers or money for presents (now, that’s a valuable tips for you!)
40. I have no tattoo, but still consider getting one, together with Jo
41 I have no ideas anymore… :p

Beberapa waktu yang lalu, pulang pesta, gw distop polisi!
Wah, jelas gw panik banget, karena dari awal juga gw udah ada feeling jelek nggak mau nyetir, karena sampe sekarang gw masih takut bawa mobil di belgi.
Tapi di malam yang ‘naas’ itu, laki gw ngotot, karena dia udah terlalu banyak minum. Dia nggak tau aja, kalau gue juga udah rada2 tipsy.

Sebenernya masalahnya cuma sepele, gara2 gw lupa nggak nyalain lampu. Maksudnya sih lampu gue nyala, tapi cuma setengah. Dan kebetulan deket tempat pesta itu, ada patroli.

Gila, gue dek2an setengah mati, waktu liat mobil polisi, apalagi waktu dia ngejar di belakang gue. Trus dengan paniknya, gue bilang ke jo "wah, kita dikejar. kita dikejar! gemana neeeh…?". Dan jo dengan santainya cuma bilang, "nggak lagi, tenang aja…" Ya udah gue nurut dong, jadi gue jalan aja terus, sambil tetep panik. Akhirnya gue berenti di depan apartemen gue, trus itu polisi ikut berenti, turun dan nyamperin mobil gw. Langsung gw bilang ke jo " tuh kan, bener!".

Gue buka pintu, nyapa itu polisi "malem pak…"
polisi: "malem, lain kali kalau nyetir sepatunya dipake yah"
gue   : "oke deh"
polisi: " coba nyalakan lampunya"
gue  : -cetek- nyalain lampu
polisi: "laen kali kalau nyetir lampunya dinyalain yah"
gue  : " Emang tadi gak nyala ya? maap ya!"
polisi: "liat sim kamu dong"

terus itu polisi ambil SIM internasional gue, dan sibuk nelpon dari mobilnya, mungkin ngecek apakah sim gw valid apa nggak…

ya ampun, gw serem banget, takut dia kepikiran buat ngecek alcohol level gw…
tapi untungnya nggak!

akhirnya, itu orang selese juga dengan sim gue, terus dia balikin itu sim dan nyuruh gue pergi lagi. Tp gw bilang "pergi kemana? orang udah nyampe kok…".

terus itu polisi bengong…
Untungnya, gw nggak kena denda atau tilang… selamet….

anyhoo, intinya sih gw cuma mau bilang:
—jangan dengerin kata orang mabok—
—ikutin apa kata hatilo—
—dont drink and drive!—

take care everyone…