Four Seasons in Belgium

Funny, how such a ‘little creature’ can change our lifes drastically.
I mean, I used to be a party girl, self-centered bitch, and goddamned ambitious… Until Alyssa came along…

Who would have thought, that instead of reading Cosmopolitan, now I read all these parenting magazines… and even joined this mommy’s club!

Being a mom has changed me drastically. And I would like to share with all of you, how I face the world now with this new title!

…Worry…
Welcome to the world full of worry!!
I get this feeling all the times! When Alyssa didn’t wanna eat, I thought, maybe she’s ill. When she ate too much, I was afraid that she’d puke or have stomach-ache or worse… getting too big! When she didn’t wanna sleep, I got pissed, but when she slept too long, I kept on checking her, to make sure she’s still breathing!
It’s completely normal, yet annoying!

…A one-handed-mom…
Since Alyssa was born, I forgot that I have two hands! The thing is, my left hand is always busy, either holding Alyssa or pushing the pram! Quite frankly, I dunno how any other moms with more than one kid can manage.. and survive!!!

…You’re not everything in this world anymore, She is!!! …
If you were a spoiled brat like me, who thought that the world would stop spinning without you, then you should be thankful that once your baby was born, a new you were also born on the same day! Forget that you haven’t bought yourself a new pair of jeans since last year, forget that you need to go to the spa to rejuvenate yrself, all you could think about is that little one of yours! Becareful!!! You might end up creating a new -maybe even worse- spoiled brat just like the old you!

…Proudness…
I’ve never been so proud before about anything in my life the way I feel now for having Alyssa… Even silly little things she does, can make me fly to the moon!!! I was a proud woman, proud with my achievements… but all those were nothing compared to what I’m feeling now. When she smiled at me, when she kissed me, when she was being friendly to other people… Even when she did something ‘bad’ like jumping out of the bed or begging for food from some stranger in the mall (sumpah, malu2in abes!)…

…Compromise…
Some people call it ’sacrifice’, but I refuse to use that word. Yeah, I have to give up my career. Yeah, I have to stay at home all the times. Yeah, I have to wake up in the middle of the night when I prefer to stay in bed… Yeah, I cant go partying whenever I want to. But then so what? She never asked to be born.. She also gives me so much joy…

…Patience…
I thought I was the most impatient person in this world. But somehow, Alyssa has her own ‘magic’ that makes me melt and cant get angry with her. ( I think she has it from her Dad!)

…Strength…
I’ve always known that I was strong, but I didn’t know that I could be that strong!!! I mean raising children is not easy, especially in my case, where I practically have to do anything on my own! (Jo is a terrific dad, but he spends most of the time working).

…The most challenging job…
When I was young (!), I underestimated these stay-home-mums. I thought what an easy life they had!!! It’s such a no-brainer job!!! But then now, I realized how WRONG I was!
Before, my motto was: Work hard, party hard!!! I spent hours and hours in the office, dealing with unimaginable deadlines and unbelievable projects, but they were nothing compared to what I’m facing now!!!!
Don’t get me wrong, I still wanna have a career again some day, but I just wanna tell you that motherhood is not an easy job!!! It is the most demanding, challenging, but also fulfilling job I’ve ever had!!!!