Four Seasons in Belgium

1. Diet
This was an eternal resolution for me. At least every week, I told anyone who wanted to listen to me, that I was gonna start on a diet. But of course, it always failed. But not this time!

2. Stop Smoking
If you ever read my post: go smokers go 1 and 2, you might be surprised with the fact that I ever considered to stop smoking. The thing is, last night, I had a bad coughing -sort of an asthma attack-. Then suddenly, the good side of me told the bad one,
      ’ I guess it’s time for you to stop. Forget the world economy. You owe it to your own daughter. If you can do it for yourself, then at least do it for her. She deserves to have a healthy mom, the one who can always be with her to support her…"
      This time, the bad fanny listened to the good fanny. And if this reason is not strong enough, then I guess nothing will. So please help me God!

3. Be a better Mom
2006 will be the last year that I can keep Alyssa in the safety of our home. In 2007, she has to start school. I have to let her go to the wild,dangerous,ugly, real world out there… (a bunch of 2.5 years old in the kindergarten can be really wild,dangerous and ugly….you know?!!). That’s why, next year is the only time left for me to spoil her rotten and spend as much time as possible.

4. Be more patient and grown up.
Enough said.

That’s all folk!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!!!

Holiday season is coming…
Although I dont celebrate christmas, I dont mind receiving gifts!!! *wink*

To make it easier for you to choose what I want, check out my wishlist at the bottom of this blog.

Too lazy? Ok.. i’ll type it down…

Books

1. A million little pieces >> James Frey
2. The undomestic goddes >> Sophie Kinsella
3. Rachel’s Ray 30minutes get real meals

Non Books

1. Anything from Burberry or Prada (!)
2. Deep Freezer
3. Jeans
4. Vouchers from Wijnegem shopping centre or H&M or Etam

If you give me one of the above… you’ll get my undivided love!!!

Beberapa waktu yang lalu gue chatting dengan seorang teman lama. Kita sering bilang, kalau kita punya banyak kesamaan.

Sama-sama dibesarkan oleh single moms yang super tegar…
Sama-sama jadi ibu muda nan sexy (!)…
Sama-sama punya toddler yang cantik dan seumuran…
Sama-sama punya suami yang berbeda bangsa…
Sama-sama pernah punya karier yang ‘menjanjikan’…

Pokoknya, sama banget deh!

Udah lama sebenernya gue nggak pernah ketemu dia. Sekitar 3-4 tahun kalau gak salah. Tapi karena ibu ini termasuk salah seorang yang rajin nelpon gue (bahkan pernah masakan gue gosong gara2 keasyikan ngobrol ama ini orang, huh!), jadi kita sering curhat2an dan gosip bareng.

Dan pada suatu sore, dengan melepaskan segala keangkuhan dan ego gue (ceile), gue pun bikin suatu pengakuan. Gue bilang ke dia, ‘ Gue iri sama elo’.

Dia balik bertanya, ‘ Iri? Sama gue? Why?’

So I told her, kalau gue ngiri karena dia masih bisa punya karier, sementara karir gue sudah mandeg. Terhempas. Karam.

And of course sebagai teman yang baik, dia mencoba menghibur. Segala blah… blah.. blah.. ucapan tentang betapa menjadi ibu rumah tangga adalah pekerjaan yang sangat mulia dan sulit…

She did a good job. I felt better already.

And then she told me…
‘ You know what? I envy you!’

Gue lupa kenapa dia ngiri sama gue. I guess it was something to do with my hubby… That I can spend more time with mine..

The thing is, it makes me think about something.

I R I

Sebuah kata yang sederhana, tapi dalem banget artinya.
Sebuah rasa yang kalau kita biarkan bisa sangat merusak.
Sebuah sifat yang dibenci sama Rasul.

Kenapa yah kita hidup nggak bisa lepas dari iri? Kenapa kita cenderung selalu ingin lebih? kenapa kita terus-terusan ngeliat ke atas? Kapan kita bisa menjadi manusia2 yang selalu berterimakasih dan menerima kondisi kita?

Ah… gue jadi iri dengan orang-orang yang selalu ingat untuk bersyukur sama yang di Atas…

Sore tadi gue asyik berchatting ria dengan istribawel. Kita asyik ngegosipin si suamigila, lakinya si istribawel yang dulunya adalah temen gue di Maersk. Hehehee, maap ya Dyt, gue sedikit bongkar rahasia lo ke Ninit…

Setelah cekikikan berdua —ralat. paling gak gue yang cekikikan, gue gak tau apakah si ninit ikut cekikan atau nggak meskipun dia ketik segala macam smiley faces icons, tapi siapa tau itu cuma sopan santunnya dia aja, hehehehe—

Aniweiii, setelah cekikikan, gue jadi teringat kelakuan kang mas bule gue, yang juga suka bikin gue nyureng.

Alkisah, suatu hari gue terbangun di kegelapan malam (ceile). Gue mendapati kang mas bule lagi duduk bengong dengan tampang mikir serius didepan lemari yang terbuka lebar. Tapi karena gue ngantuk, gue cuma berpikir ‘whatever’ , dan balik bobo lagi.

Paginya gue terbangun dengan kang mas yang tertidur manis di samping gue. Interupsi sedikit, Jo itu ganteng kalau lagi bobo! Temen gue pernah bilang, kalau gue beruntung bangun pagi disambut dengan tampang oke yang gak bikin sumpek! But the question is, does jo think that he’s lucky to wake up next to me yang suka ngiler kemana-mana… huehehee

Lanjut,
Gue bangun dan keinget kejadian semalem tapi gue pikir, gue cuma mimpi aja. Setelah ngulet sana sini dan nge-grepein laki gue, gue bangkit dari tempat tidur buat setor… Biasa, panggilan alam di pagi hari.

Balik dari toilet, gue pergi ke kamar dan ngeliat yayang gue masih pules. Gue pun mutusin buat ikut bobo lagi..

But wait… What’s that sparkly ‘lil thing under his side of bed?Dengan penasaran, gue berjingkat mendekati…

Ternyata saudara-saudara… benda kecil berkilat itu adalah tas pesta gue yang penuh payet!!!

Olala.
Now the question is, WHY?

Nggak berapa lama kemudian kang mas bule gue bangun. Langsung gue mulai interogasi.

Ternyata dia nggak inget kejadian malem sebelumnya. Dan kejadian ini bukan yang pertama kali. For the record, waktu masih teenager dan tinggal ama mamanya, dia pernah pipis di ruang belajar pas tengah malem. Gara-garanya dia ngantuk banget dan salah masuk kamar. Instead of masuk wc, dia malah masuk ruang belajar yang deketan ama wc tadi. Setelah pipis, dengan cueknya dia balik bobo lagi. Jadilah si mama ngepel malem-malem…

Oke, now i found out that my hubby is a sleepwalker.
But still, I have another question nagging in my head…

Pertanyaannya sekarang adalah.. kenapa dia ngambil tas gue?

Pas gue tanyain ini ke dia, Jo cuma angkat bahu sambil monyongin bibir…

Finally, gue cuma bisa bilang ke dia..

Honey, you know how much I love you..
If you desperately want my purse, you should’ve just asked me…
There’s no need to sneak out in the middle of the night like that…
You know I’ll give anything to you……..

Huehehhehehehe, you should have seen his face then!!!!!

Brr… It is werry werry cold today!!!

When I was just a little girl, I always thought it’d be so nice to live abroad. Somewhere where they have winter season and white glowing snow…

But now, when I got the opportunity (or in my case, it’s more like a curse then opportunity), I’m dying to get back to live in a nice warm country like Indonesia (too warm for my liking, but what the heck!).

What a life… You always want something you cant have.
The grass is always greener on the other side.

Ah well.. it’s typical.
Seems like I just have to do what I have to do.

To live life to the fullest.
As long as I still have some chocolate left in the fridge, I’ll be OK.

Have a nice and (hopefully) warm weekend, people…

Dear Alyssa,

Mama wants you to be smart, smarter then everyone in your class, in the neighborhood, in the whole wide world.
Mama wants you to be pretty, prettier than Charlize Theron, Angelina Jolie, or any other model/superstar in Hollywood.
Mama wants you to be strong, stronger than Kartini or Hilary Clinton.
Mama wants you to be rich and successful. As rich and as successful as Oprah, Bill Gates, or AP Moller (Lol!)

Because mama thinks you deserves all the very best…

But sometimes mama forget,
That actually, those things are not the most important things in this world.

Mama also forget, that those are the things, that mama wants. But does Alyssa want the same?

What’s the point of being the smartest kid in the class if you were cheating?
What’s the point of being pretty if you become arrogant?
What’s the point of being strong if you become rude?
And what’s the point of being rich and successful, if you don’t use it to help others in need…

So forget what mama has just said…

Alyssa can be anything that Alyssa wants, as long as Alyssa is happy and satisfied and as long as Alyssa remembers to be helpful and respectful to others…

Alyssa doesn’t have to be the smartest or the cutest kid in the block… Because for mama, you will always be My Number One…

Mama realizes, that mama is not the best mom in the universe. But mama will try, to be the very best for Alyssa…
Because just like mama has told you before.. Alyssa deserves the best!

Just remember, that mama loves you so much, and that mama will always be there for you…

with love,
Mama

My Akung past away. The one and only grandpa I’ve ever had.

He died last wednesday, but I just heard the news this afternoon. My family decided to tell me this weekend, knowing that Jo would be there for me.

Still, the shock was unbearable…

I’ve tried to numb my feeling, but it wont just go away…

In this misery, one can only raise so many unanswered questions; thousands of WHYs and WHAT IFs…

The last time I said goodbye to him was last July, when I, Jo and Alyssa visited him in Indonesia. Something told me then, that it’d be our last meeting. Never knew I could be so right…

He told me, that his love, thoughts and prayers will always be with us…
And I believe him.

Again, in this misery, one can only try to find some consolations. He had been sick for so long. And now, God had taken away all the pain. He’s in a better place, he’s not suffering anymore.

I guess he’d been waiting for that day to come. First, he waited to see us, then he waited for Idul Fitri.
Then, he was free…

And now, he can visit me anytime he wants. Without having to take any flight.

Goodbye Akung,
I hope you know how much we love you…
And how much we’ll be missing you…